Incompatibility: is it reason enough for getting separated???


Lot of marriages fail and break these days. And reason?? Incompatibility.

It’s just one word but has fifty shades in itself. People feel they are incompatible and hence cannot live together or rather cannot live happily together. But are we not supposed to be individuals first before being anyone else or being a relation to someone??

And are there two people who are compatible through and through? I don’t think so. Even if they like same things, they will like in a different way. If they have same destination, they would tread different paths to reach there. If they hate something, the underlying reasons could be entirely different. Like fingerprints, no two humans can be same ever. So why do we assume we need to be compatible to be happily married?

Life would be so much easier if we could enjoy the differences and respect others for their likes and choices. It really is not so difficult to understand why someone likes something , especially when there is love existing between two people. 

And from personal experience, I can say that it’s easier and fruitful to accept the so called incompatibility and enjoy the differences. If you try to change yourself or someone else, it is never going to work. It might make the things worse in the long run as it adds a burden on you and the other person and kills your individuality..



2 thoughts on “Incompatibility: is it reason enough for getting separated???

  1. mylifesapark

    As someone who was married 23 years and has been divorced 12, I say try hard to stay married. I am a decent looking woman and thought I could find someone who would meet my needs. I don’t know why I thought that when It had taken me so long to find one person I wanted to marry. But my husband and I were family if not steamy lovers. We had much in common but were world apart when it came to communication, I miss him. I have been poor most of the years since the divorce. I lost my health insurance. I am the one who has stayed with my daughter with high functioning Asperger’s syndrome. He was a nice man with no malice in him, but he could not understand how his actions affected other people.I would have had to change and quietly but firmly stood up for what I wanted and needed. HE needed to be told, not just suggested to. I couldn’t be any lonelier than i am now. I regret my divorce almost everyday. If we had stayed married there would have been hard days, but there would have been many of family security.and companionship.

  2. coolfriendlygal Post author

    @ mylifesapark,

    i have tried hard but it is not just working out. i know many people who live in a compromised marriage and life and they stay unhappy. i think i have to give myself a chance, i want to be loved passionately, I think i deserve it.
    i am sorry for you condition and can feel your pain but i have had more hard days which makes it difficult to expect a not-so-unhappy married life with him.


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